I wanted to journal so much yesterday, but resisted the temptation and boy, I'm glad I did!!!! Still haven't finished the profile section.... add to eternal procrastination list/ just do it?? Yesterday was a BAD BAD day. Woke at 4 a.m. with screeching pain in back and could not get comfortable, but was so.o.o.o.o. tired, so tossed and turned until I figured it must be after 6 a.m. Well, it was. It was 6:01. Then, and I know all you chronic sufferers of depression will empathize, spent most of morning telling myself not to kill myself. You know how it goes - grit teeth, don't kill yourself, don't kill yourself. Sometimes every 10 minutes and sometimes every 10 seconds. Gave myself a good mental ticking off and decided to mindnumbingly work on my daughter's quilt which is very traditional, black and white pieced and OK, but not much room for creativity in my book. Also, found I had adapted an old song (I think by Ray Brown and the Whispers - God I was in love with Ray Brown in my youth). It went like this (my version):
Depression - torments my heart
Depression - tears me apart
Why torture me?
I've a feeling that the original word was Suspicion. Do you think I could get it out of my brain?Then, thought no - going to finish off the ATCs I want to swap with my newest blog buddy Arlee. Which reminds me, go to her brilliant site and read EVERYTHING - she is just the best!!! Twere she who inspired me to start my own blog. Here's the link : http://arleebarr.squarespace.com/designjournal/ . To my total incredulity (is that right??) I finished them and she likes two. Here is the one remaining if anyone else wants a swap, the pic is up the top (dunno how that happened, but I will try to fix the next one (still learning). As my eldest daughter, Nat, is getting married next April and I have foolishly offered to create the bonbonniere, I decided to fiddle with that idea. I thought, use her theme colours - pale pink, blue, violet and green and make little beach basket things by weaving fabric strips in those colours and fusing onto interfacing, cut out pattern etc. They will be filled with tiny seashells and a coupla handmade chockies. To cut an extremely long and most painful story short, I ended up with a nice result but hardly worth all the time and effort and farting around - bearing in mind I need about 60 of the little buggers! Will try to put the appropriate photo HERE: Do you know what, I cannot do this just now, it is making me crazy - so look at the left hand side at the top!!!! I will definitely check out how to do it and practice tomorrow. I am playing around with making bottlebrush type of flowers and the prototype should be ready soon - BUT FIRST I HAVE TO GET OFF THIS GODDAMNED COMPUTER!!!!! The rest of my day is going to involve that quilt for Nat come hell or high water!